I Can Extract the Plot ( As a Trash Side-Character) Chapter 3: Chapter 3: protagonist Problem

Read chapter 3 of I Can Extract the Plot ( As a Trash Side-Character) by Arthur04 on NovelPedia.

Caelen had discovered something very important about life. When a regressor heroine said: "The timeline is changing." …that was generally your cue to start running. Unfortunately, running was currently impossible. Because Princess Elena du Sol stood between him and the mausoleum exit. Also because she was absurdly strong. Even at this point in the story, Elena was already considered a once-in-a-generation monster. The kind of protagonist who killed demon generals at sixteen and treated near-fatal injuries like mild inconveniences. Meanwhile, Caelen's greatest achievement today was successfully stealing abstract ideas from dead objects. The power gap felt disrespectful. Elena slowly scanned the mausoleum. Her sharp crimson eyes moved across the rows of coffins with unsettling precision. Caelen stayed completely still behind the stone tomb. Don't breathe loudly. Don't move. Don't protagonist. Easy. Elena suddenly spoke again. "You can come out." Nope. Not falling for that. Classic protagonist detection bait. Caelen remained motionless. A long pause followed. Then: "I know someone is here." Still nope. Silence stretched. Then Elena sighed. Actually sighed. Like an overworked office employee forced into unpaid overtime. "In the last timeline," she muttered, "this place collapsed because an idiot noble tried stealing grave jewelry." Caelen blinked. What? "Which means," she continued tiredly, "if you're hiding behind the Third Patriarch's coffin, you have approximately thirty seconds before the floor gives out beneath you." Caelen stared downward. The stone beneath his boots cracked. "…Oh." The mausoleum exploded. Stone shattered beneath him as the entire section collapsed downward into darkness. Caelen dropped with several hundred pounds of screaming aristocratic architecture. For one beautiful moment, he experienced absolute clarity. This right here was why he hated protagonists. He crashed through rotten wooden supports, bounced off a coffin, and slammed violently into a lower chamber floor. Dust erupted everywhere. Pain shot through his ribs. Somewhere above, Elena shouted: "You actually WERE there?!" "THAT'S your reaction?!" Caelen yelled back. Rubble shifted. A skeleton wearing ceremonial armor rolled directly into his lap. Wonderful. The skull stared at him accusingly. Caelen stared back. "Your family architecture sucks." The skeleton offered no defense. A red blur suddenly dropped from above. Elena landed lightly beside him, completely unharmed because apparently gravity respected main characters. The underground chamber illuminated under the glow of her sword aura. Ancient stone walls stretched outward in circular patterns. Old ritual markings covered the floor. At the chamber's center stood a black altar wrapped in chains. Caelen immediately recognized it. And internally screamed. Oh no. No no no. This was a hidden dungeon trigger. One of the early-game disaster events. Originally inaccessible until Chapter 47. Why was it opening now?! Elena slowly turned toward him. For the first time, they looked directly at each other. Her eyes narrowed instantly. Caelen understood why immediately. Because he looked suspicious as hell. Dirty servant cloak. Standing in forbidden ruins. Holding a bag full of stolen graveyard relics. And radiating pure "future side villain" energy. "Who are you?" Elena asked flatly. Think. Fast. Caelen pointed upward. "Victim of structural betrayal." "…What?" "The floor attacked me first." Elena stared at him. Then at the collapsed ceiling. Then back at him. "…Are you insane?" "A little." Correct answer apparently. Because her expression somehow softened into exhausted disbelief instead of murderous suspicion. Unfortunately that lasted exactly three seconds. Her gaze sharpened suddenly. "You." Caelen's survival instincts activated instantly. Danger. Extreme danger. Elena stepped closer slowly. "Your face," she murmured. Ah. Right. Problem. Caelen Vance. The coward noble who died early in the original timel